Falling off the wagon
I have something to admit… I recently fell off the wagon.
In the aftermath, I was engulfed with self-disappointment and angry with myself for not taking my commitment more seriously. I felt like I’d thrown the last 20 days away.
Then, after a not-so-fun stroll down self-hatred lane, I came to the realisation that beating myself up was not helping anything. Instead, I needed to remain proud of the effort I had been putting in. This time two months ago, 20 days seemed impossible.
Moving forward, I need to accept that this is a huge lifestyle change which will take practice and time.
One thing I have learnt from this is the importance of surrounding myself with the culture of sobriety. When I initially embarked upon this journey in January, I immersed myself in quit lit books, Instagram accounts and blogs all of which really helped me stay on track. When I stopped investing in these things, the old thoughts of “don’t be boring” and “just have one” began to creep back in.
With that in mind, I’ve also restarted my Sober Rainbow – yay!
For every day I’m sober, I colour in a square in a bright colour. It serves as a daily reminder of my achievement as well as being a beautiful visualisation of how bright sobriety is…
I’m going to continue down this road of sober curiosity & self-development. I will celebrate my small achievements and accept that mistakes may happen. The point in this is to build a happier, healthier me.
Wish me luck!